Between Lord and ME

Between Lord and me.

For once I may have been driven away from what I think of the matter of God, but that was centuries ago and the air was just clearing for my race to pitch camp. From what I have seen God has always been an experience for an individual and never a community. The first human to have thought of God always thought in his own genuine manner and so God was more important to a person as an individual and not as a mass.

The race grew, flourished, evolved and began the deterioration of God, while humans grew senseless enough to divide the land and make boundaries between people, they were further retarded to divide Gods. This, to please them so that, when they couldn’t fight their Gods would, and so Gods became enemies. Gods were now limited to little areas and lesser people. Mankind has done terribly to something which it created with so much passion and devotion. Who wouldn’t look at this act and not say that man was selfish before mankind had barely begun on Earth.

Refuting Gods, people fighting in the name of the Lord, confusing God with religion and deepening this poison day by day in the minds of everyone. Rough present situation points its way back to the first days of man, when Green and blue and white were the only three colors visible on Earth from space. Thereafter people went fanatic on religion and red color of blood started marking stark religious boundaries on our beautiful blue-green-white ball of life.

God is a personal phenomenon; it is a process of discovering the outside world through deepening knowledge of the self or the individual. When we begin to know ourselves from inside of us, then comes the realization and understanding of everything outside. But this is all futile too because if you look around no two things are separable completely. There are no clear demarcations of anything whatsoever. The whole system is in a constant state of flux, and for me this flux is God. Yes, indeed the ‘constant change’, thought flow and breathing are just a few representations of the intricate magic spread around us.

Only when we train ourselves to look with one eye, the eye which takes in all views simply and without attachments. And contemporary writers and thinkers understand this concept slightly less than the legendary geniuses. Even then, they put it aptly in a TV series titled Mr. Robot, when the protagonist an extraordinary hacker takes on huge corporations with his hallucinatory visions. When Elliott, the male lead goes for a religious therapy session, he walks out abruptly when the moderator gave her a sermon about Jesus, his reply went thus, “Why should I believe in your imaginary friend, when you don’t believe in mine?”

 

Our Gods are imaginary, what are real is us and the universe. Trust me there are no Gods, no heaven, no hell. It’s just us and this infinite universe. You may choose anyone or anything to call your God. The Vedanta philosophy puts it aptly when they reflect that God is in us or simply we are potential Gods of our own universes.

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Laments of Two Writers. 

​“I suppose that is what we lack- the motivation to write”. And that struck the chords on our ratiocination. We lacked motivation. There was exiguousness of something that pushes us forward- to take the next step, to write the next line. We were bereft of that push- that proclamation of our conscience that tells us why we need to do something, why we need to write. ‘Cause that is what motivation is- a push; subdued or mordant, that push is what keeps us going.
 “Motivation to write- to write what’s right..” “..and make it right to write it”. Wow..!! We are lost as writers. After having jotted down hundreds of poems, songs and ballads of broken hearts, now as the beats get fainter, our words are lost in our thoughts. We are as lost as ‘Alice’, in the ‘Wonderland’ of inked and digitalized expressive utterances. 
To understand why we need motivation or even that slight push to our vehemence, it is important for us to sustain and acknowledge it. We have endured and reconciled ourselves to euphoric moments of acclimation, but have found ourselves ‘sans- motivation’ everytime we have needed it in profusion. Every time we have tried to cajole ourselves into reorientation, we have sunken deeper into the twilight of our minds, for betraying our own resolutions. 
Undergoing those moments of self-betrayal is what we need to apprehend the role of the word ‘motivation’ in our lives. We then discern that we cannot count upon ourselves to psych us up. That is when we seek extraneous resources. We count upon sources like friends family, books, internet and what not. Sometimes they work, sometimes nothing at all helps. Then we again wander back to our own profundity, feeling indefensible. That is when we truly comprehend the phrase, ‘God helps those who help themselves’. We are hardly motivated by an external reinforcement ’cause we are unable to grasp the complete sense of it; mostly. Unless we ourselves want to do something, nothing can basically make us budge.
Yes, it is our firm believe that only we can pull ourselves out of the black-hole. It’s our own voices that are capable of escorting us to the effulgence, illuminated by our own hands. Having read all those ‘motivational books’ and ‘self-helf literature’, now we know that it’s all momentary; nothing lasts. All we are looking for is an uninterrupted flow of ‘motivational sap’; but to no avail. Motivation can only be intermittently recharged by these borrowed sources, it is us who needs to keep the flame ablaze. 
But yet again, we fail to persuade ourselves. We fail to synchronize our brains with our hearts. Yes, it’s always a squabble between our hearts and our brains. When it’s our passion to do something, it comes straight from our hearts. Our hearts know why we need to write- how we have always wanted to do it, how we cannot imagine ourselves doing anything else or how it’s the only outlet to our emotions. But nothing seems to help- reason?Our brains always overpower. Yes, brain is a logical organ, it knows how to sort it’s priorities- but according to the immediate need of the hour. So the urgency, of our ‘knows-no-logic’ hearts, is mostly shut off. That is how we procrastinate. Logic always finds a way over passion. Had we been bounded to it, had it been something we had to do for a cause, our brains would have freed our hearts to empower. Only if we could find a way to tame both our hearts and brains..!!

   – Sana & Sahar

A Running Thought Being Interrupted.

In his own words he had damned himself for eternity, to follow his lost soul into darkness and in that darkness he found a new light of dawn. It is true night is darkest before dawn and truer that when nothing else is left to lose a man becomes invincible to pain. What we have here is this amazing aim to do something that will outlast my journey and will journey in to beyond. Yes, we will come back if need be but in new forms. Why such tardiness and contracted outlook towards things, open up and embrace it , whatever it is out there is inside you too. Connect and innovate. 

After I died. 

After I died.
After I died I became a thought, a consciousness, a way of thinking perhaps. The body around my mind had been detached like the falling of a leaf from a tree or a raindrop leaving its cloud.
After I died I lived more than I had ever when I was alive. Being alive and dead is not so different it seems now. I am alive but as a pure expression, and no strings that came with the body are now attached.
I have lived before by many names and by many faces. In the transition called death, I realise that I am actually immortal.

I conjoined in the dance I had been dancing since time eternal and the beginning of the universe. Only after I died I realised that I was not less alive but more connected to the portal through which all living pass, have passed, shall pass and will keep passing. This portal connects me to anyone I want. My consciousness is free to plug anywhere I want it to. To who ever I want it to. I can be anywhere, anyone, anybody because I am no one. Since I am zero I can get behind any number.
My mind now reckons that it was in a dormant state and now it has unlocked its full potential. I am omnipresent. In one moment I am the wind, in another I am the fruit on a tree , in another instant I materialise as sunlight from the sun , ever changing my form and flowing as one energy to another in the universe.
I am not dead, I am more alive now. I am a vibration and this universe is vibrational.

The Reason Behind Universe. 

At the back of my mind, subconsciously one question has always puzzled me, although there are many such puzzling questions firing in my neurons all the time but the one I am talking about is the trickiest one. I have a simple theory, according to my observations, everything that happens around us has a reason. From the most miniscule to the mega events, everything is governed by reason. What is the reason for universe ? Why was it ever created, and for what purpose ? I have this feeling that no one can understand the question I am seeking the answer of. It is a helplessness to live with a question weighing you down.

You may say time comes with answers to all questions, but this question demands a lifetime and no guarantee of a certain answer. To experience what I am talking about is beyond daily and usual. It is bigger and deeper than we can begin to imagine and compared to it I am nothing. Imagine such a grand scheme laid out perfectly, a master plan played out to what end and why in the first place ?

We try with our limited tools and intelligence to figure out what it is all about but we to say the least we haven’t even scratched  the surface. Time and space are just theories and in reality even what I write is just my perception.  The willingness to believe is simply your own decision. The best way to sum up all this is that everything is about choices, at least everything that is about us. The other choices were just made by themselves as the events unfolded.

There is no control of human beings over matters of planets or stars dying and comets passing. We can only hope to control nations and planets at most.

The universe, however is a bigger concept. If we consider the pattern, the universe is ruled by laws which we cannot understand yet and beings whom we have no proof of!

As a poet and as a writer , my theory is the universe has no reason, nothing ever is reasonable. It is all just theories and chains to bind your mind. If anything universe is , it is free.  It is beyond all logic, any definition or perception and in the least universal.

I have met people 

I have met people who were too conscious of themselves, too much exclusivity in their lives is impossible.  They will share, but only a portion of their lives. They will dream but with definite boundaries, and then interpret those dreams by someone else’s description.

I have met people who thought what others thought, saw others’ visions and lived a life which was only an attempt at acceptance from others.
I have met people who knew too much and spoke too little, I have met people who knew too little and spoke too much. I have met people who were oblivious to present and some who lived in the not so distant future. I have met people with different ways of thinking.
I have met people who held their belief in stones, some who held theirs in currency notes, few others who lived for votes. I have met people who were more dead than alive.

I have met people who were like little suns, shining like beacons of light but dark inside.

I have met people who never forgot a path once they traveled on it. I have met people who were so certain about the far future that they didn’t notice death standing nearby. I have met people who embraced their death smiling and some who cried.

I have met people who create life, artists who capture imaginations and dreamers who believed nothing was impossible. I have met musicians who created music so sublime that time stopped and space stood by.

I have met strangers who felt like a part of me and I a part of them. I met people who looked fine but were broken inside.

I have met people who were at peace and knew neither love nor hate. I knew people who were always angry and some who always smiled.

This world is full of multitudes of people, so go out there and be your self.

 

Cheers to life !